A Daily Reflection: “How much do I really love and honor every note?”

What we do with the least is how much we can expect of ourselves with the most.

Because, wherever we go, there we are.

I don’t say this because I have mastered it. I am a continual work in progress and these are things I challenge myself about when I take time to reflect….trust me, I have lots of room to grow!!

Loving and honoring every note…

Our attitude is everything, and I believe we have to practice having the right attitude just like we would exercise to make a muscle stronger. Think of it as our heart muscle. How much am I really caring? Am I giving it all I’ve got? Am I treating the whole notes with as much dedication as the “money notes”, as my friend Cindy calls them. ☺️

Often we get focused on achieving the end result but it’s what builds up to that, the process, each step, each note, the nitty gritty details all put together that create that whole. We cannot let notes go by unawares and uncared for, or without confirming our highest standard and expect the final result to have the excellence we are ultimately craving.

What qualities are most important to me? What do I love about this note? What do I love about this sound? Have I explored all options or opportunities for how this note serves the phrase? How do I want to feel, my audience to feel when experiencing this note, this passage? Is this pleasing to my Lord God? Are there areas, times, notes where I tend to ignore or turn a blind eye? Why? If I dig into that, I discover a lot about myself.

Each note, each step serves the whole. Without it, we won’t have the whole.

It’s so easy to let stuff slide, to excuse this or that. But we need to take honest inventory to see where we really are compared to where we really want to be. The more often, the better.

Where can you already celebrate that you are totally in love with that note? (This step is SUPER important - we must notice what is going well if we want it to stick!!) What is happening? What is contributing to that feeling?

Where do you know you can care more? What might be contributing to when you aren’t caring?

Caring deeply is not the same as being worried something will go wrong. In fact that worry will steal the potential to be able to love it. The good news is that learning to love it will drive out the fear. When we get our eyes off ourselves, that’s when the magic happens!!

For me, this boils down to who or what I’m doing this for. Is it for attention? Is it for my own sense of accomplishment? To honor the composer? Is it for others listening, for them to experience something meaningful? Is it to glorify the One who gave me my gift? A combination? It makes a big difference which of these is most my focus!

Also, what we focus on grows. What are you expecting to happen? What are you looking for? When I have cultivated a deep desire for something, a certain type of sound or color, character, it feels natural for me to deep dive into the adventure of finding it and not letting up until I do. Caring and having deep desire are very much related. The vision isn’t an accident. That intuition of what MUST BE is a gift, a treasure, to be sought and held sacred.

Not to be overly dramatic, but this boils down to life and death for me. That quest for excellence, to feel that I’ve captured the essence of what is most important to me, honoring of the music, composer, God, my audience, standards that I hold myself to, the decisions and attitudes I have, doing this OR NOT leads me down one path… or another.

The flip side is that that truly loving and honoring is not possible without surrender, humility and trust. Striving for excellence can easily become a controlling behavior. Nope! Over controlling steals the love and magic as well. Grasping with a closed fist and closed mind makes me much less available and present the moment that note is being played and given away. It makes me less and less curious to possibilities and wisdom that could come from above. God cares about what I care about. He is here with me and guess what, he was there with the composer when they were writing the piece too. What great insight can come when I ask for wisdom and am open to receive it!

It might seem impossible to care this deeply about every single note that we play on our instrument. Perhaps it is impossible, I know I have SO much room to grow here, but I believe it is worth aspiring to. Because, I believe, allowing myself not to care is poison.

Challenge: develop my heart muscle by witnessing how long I naturally show up with a great attitude. How many phrases? How many minutes? Then, build on top of that a little bit more every single day. Strengthen your heart muscle little by little. Imagine what it will be like to persevere all the way through a piece of music with absolute reverence and adoration for every note that you are experiencing and giving. Ask God to be there with you and guide you before you start and while playing. When we do that, what we begin to experience is more an act of worship than anything else! It’s amazing!

Please share your insights on how to love without exception and not ever let yourself get jaded or ungrateful for this moment?

(Isn’t playing like a mirror into all of life?!)

Fondly,

Kim

#inspiringhabitsofharmony

#mydailywarmup